Monday, March 28, 2011

Get Your Teen Thinking You're The Best - 10 Strategies

Do you want your Son or Daughter to give you a hug next time they come to you with a problem? How about expressing to you that you're the best Mom or Dad? Well, listen up. I had this exact situation happen to me. My Son gave me a big hug (several of them) and told me he didn't know what he'd do without me.

Now I'm not no super Mom or anything. Sometimes I don't even know how it happens. I come from an average family. We have faith in our God. We also try to live by bible standards each and every day. This helps tremendously. I'm not doing anything particularly special. However, I will tell what I'm doing that's causing such reactions from both my Son and my Daughter.

How to Get Your Teen to Think You're the Best - 10 Strategies
  1. I make myself available. If I'm busy with something, I stop doing it immediately. I don't care what it is. This is very important, because teens/kids will come to you and start talking to you from out of no where. If it's important to them, you don't want to miss it or push them away. Do not tell your teen you're busy. Unless your life is on the line, you're not busy. You can always get back to what you were doing. But you may not be able to get your teen to talk to you again (openly).
  2. Show empathy. Feel what they're feeling. Agree with them on some points. This shows that you're listening and understand. Act like what they're saying is the most important thing at that time. Even if it's something minor (to you). If they hurt, you hurt too!
  3. Please don't interrupt them.
  4. Do not tell them that they're wrong for having the feelings they have.
  5.  Even if some of their views are a little over the top, this is no time to correct them. Just listen. You can help them to have the proper views later (after they've poured out their feelings to you).
  6. Ask them questions on how they would like the problem solved. Try to get them to think of the solution. Try hard to let the solution to the problem remain with them.
  7. Offer suggestions. This gives them proper guidance. They may not know the proper way to go about solving the problem.
  8. Your child will be hurting. This is the time to build him/her back up. If they handled the situation in a mature way, commend him/her. Remind them of their good qualities.
  9. Another very important suggestion is to thank them for sharing this with you. After all, they didn't have to. They'll remember how you responded and they'll want to share more with you.
  10. Continually remind them that they can come to you at any time and any day. Again make sure when they do, you make yourself available.
When all is said and done, your teen may give you a big hug and tell you that you're the best. If doesn't happen the first time, don't give up. Change how you listen and follow these suggestions closely. In time your teen will give you a hug.

Thanks for reading!

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